You finally did it. You got rid of that Zenith B&W Console TV with the rabbit ears and dial channel changer (remote control? what’s that?) that you’ve had since the Supremes first signed with Motown Records and joined the 21st century.
Your brand new Samsung Ultra HD 4K flat screen TV rocks the hell out of your living room and has garnered you a whole new group of “friends,” but unlike the Zenith, it doesn’t come with a built-in storage unit. Why does that matter, you may ask? Not only does a TV storage unit keep your $800-dollar television free from dust and other damaging elements, but it’s a great place to store related electronics like an A/V receiver or your entire Seinfeld DVD collection.
So here is a list of the most common types of TV storage units:
The Open-Faced Sandwich Unit
This unit does not have doors, but it has about 500 miles worth of shelves that you can adjust to your needs. Here you can place your DVD player (and VHS player if you’re having trouble believing that the video tape is now obsolete), collection of movies and television shows, and even a plant or a framed picture to make this look less like a warehouse and more like an IKEA show room. One of the benefits over putting your TV on a crate or even mounting it on the wall is the opening at the back of this unit that allows you to neatly organize all the wires.
The Low-Maintenance Unit
If you couldn’t care less about organization and sprucing up the look of your living room, this low-maintenance TV unit is right up your alley. Made of particleboard and melamine foil or metal, it contains a couple of drawers into which you can throw your movies, remote controls, and all those extra cables that you can never figure out what to do with. Simply close the drawers and it’s out of sight, out of mind. The disadvantage is that there’s no place for your Blu-ray player, but if you’re like many people and are addicted to reality TV shows about storage, then you really have no use for a movie-playing contraption.
The Artist’s Loft Unit
Living in an artist’s loft comes with many responsibilities, such as maintaining a caffeine addiction, bring angst-ridden, and eschewing all forms of walls and doors. This last point means that you will require a ladder-style TV storage unit. To preserve your artist rep, you should place wicker baskets on the shelves and well-placed random objects, like a miniature brass bicycle or homemade clay urns.
The Holier Than Thou Unit
There are some people, believe it or not, who don’t like to watch TV, or “the boob tube,” as they so piously (and, let’s be honest, accurately) call it. And then there are others who say they don’t watch television, but in reality do. These people absolutely require a concealed TV entertainment unit. Not only does it come with doors, but when closed, the unit looks like it could be an old-fashioned wardrobe to stash extra blankets or booze for the winter.
So there are the most common types of TV storage units. But now that you’ve studied this list, chosen one that suits your needs, and purchased and installed it, I should probably tell you: televisions have just become obsolete.