Cirque du Storage Unit

circus tent trailer

Photo Credit: def110 via Compfight cc

What’s not to love about the circus? From the colorful tents and adventurous performers to the exotic animals and the smell of popcorn and cotton candy, just the thought of attending the event brings a smile to your face. But what happens when the lights dim, the applause stops and the animals go back in their cages? Well, the skilled entertainers pack up all their props and costumes and return to their regular lives, leaving their secret identities locked up in a self-storage facility. Ah, to be a fly on the wall in those storage units….

The Bearded Lady

At first glance, the Bearded Lady’s self-storage unit may appear like a typical collection of women’s dresses, shoes and purses. And then you look a little further. You discover a box filled with old shaving cream cans, men’s razors and a deluxe beard trimmer. But there’s just one problem: there is no men’s clothing to be found. If it weren’t for that single box, you would have never known that you had just stepped into the storage unit of one of the most sought-after rarities in the circus world. Women who can grow legitimate beards are not easy to come by, so you might want to take a few souvenir photos.

The Sword Swallower

Upon entering the Sword Swallower’s compartment, you can easily tell that this is not your ordinary storage unit. Here is a collection of intricate, old-world swords that would make King Arthur himself squirm with jealousy. But with the assortment of gaudy costumes and over-the-top tuxedos, you realize that this is no Round Table; it’s the storage unit of a Sword Swallower. That explains the abundance of throat spray and cough drops.

The Strong Man

A lot of people use storage facilities to store bulky weights, but very few of have the collection of heavy items that you stumble across in the Strong Man’s storage unit. When you enter, you are immediately impressed by the display of everything from freestanding weights to enormous barbells to an entire sofa. The Strong Man clearly needs to work out to maintain his enviable physique, and he does so with any heavy item he can find. As you turn, you notice a home gym setup, complete with a weight-lifting bench (does the Strong Man actually use his storage unit as a gym?). In the final box you peer into, you see a collection of barely-there costumes, which are obviously meant to show off all of his hard work (and you would be fine if you never saw again).

The Trapeze Artist

When you enter the self-storage unit of the Trapeze Artist, the first thing you notice is the intricate costumes. They are each neatly placed in their own plastic bag to ensure they stay safe. After all, it will soon be circus season again, and they need to be in pristine condition. Once you finish admiring the lavish and attention-to-detail spandex outfits, you dig deeper and discover cases of makeup. There is lipstick in every possible shade, blush to match and fake eyelashes galore. Out of the corner of your eye, you also notice an impressive amount of workout gear. For a moment you wonder why the trapeze artist doesn’t want these items in her home, but then you realize that this must be the overflow, and where else would she store her belongings?

The Clown

When you slide open the door to the Clown’s storage unit, you initially think that you have stumbled into a crayon factory that just exploded. But as you continue to dig through boxes, in search of the gold that must be there, you discover ridiculously large red shoes. You are either at McDonald’s or you are looking at the belongings of one of the most beloved characters in the circus. Once you find the box of giant bowties and a makeup collection that rivals a supermodel, you understand where you are. It may not be a pot of gold, but you can’t wait to uncover the stash of prank items (water-shooting flower, anyone?) to use on all of your friends.

The Animal Trainer

Scared. Shocked. Uneasy. These are the emotions that course through your body as you open the door to the Animal Trainer’s storage unit. With the assortment of cages, whips and chains, it’s clear that the person who owns this unit is something of a wild card. You timidly continue on, and then you notice the performance platform, decorated with lions and tigers and bears (oh my!). Whew! Now you realize that you are, in fact, looking at the property of an animal trainer. That’s a relief. You were more than a little worried for a second.

The life of a circus performer is exotic, unusual and loads of fun. It’s clear that they collect a large and interesting assortment of items along their journey, which isn’t very convenient to carry with them. Thank goodness they have self storage facilities to hold all the overflow and keep their belongings safe.

SSF Team

SSF Team

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